I spent a few days in Varanasi, India with my friend and brother, Mahesh.  Mahesh is a missionary with Rakesh and Sonali’s ministry, and he does a ton of things including being in charge at a boys’ hostel in Jaipur.   Mahesh came to protect me, because it would be a terrible idea for a white, blonde, foreign girl with a hat and camera to go to Varanasi alone, haha. I had an interest in going to Varanasi because one of my favorite photographers, Joey L, did an incredible series on the religious men there.  I definitely had no expectation or plan to capture the kind of photographs he took, since he’s quite the master and I know he did a lot of crazy planning for those photos. I really just wanted to go to see it, and capture what I could in a more documentary way, and observe how they lived in an extreme religious pursuit.  In order to get the opportunity to work very closely with people, it’s best to dive into their culture head first, and I knew that wasn’t something I was going to do in this particular place.

Mahesh and I took a boat ride on the Ganges River at sunset as soon as we got there.  It’s one of those touristy gotta-do things.  The Ganges River is very sacred to the Hindus living in Varanasi; I've heard they put the ashes of cremated people in it, and every morning they bathe in it. On our boat ride, we went down the shoreline a bit, and came to a place where we saw a lot of people dressed in white grouped near a few blazing fires.  The fires were burning the bodies of recently deceased people.  I wanted so badly to take some photos but our boat guide was adamant that not one single photo could be taken.  It was quite the sight.  I could just envision a National Geographic logo at the bottom of what I was seeing. Soon we came across some other docked boats and a guy from another boat jumped in ours, and tried to collect donations. We talked to him for a bit, but when he realized we wouldn't donate, he got out of the boat. The next morning we got up at about 5am to go back to the shoreline.  It was over 115 degrees during the days that we had to go out in the mornings, and also it was the best time to observe the people in their daily rituals.  I think I expected the people to be a little more open to getting photographed than they actually were.  In exchange for photos people wanted money or gifts, so I tried mostly to just capture more scenic photos. Overall, it was definitely a really interesting place, but I wouldn't have any desire to go back.  For me personally, it felt very spiritually dark, which made me feel disconnected and a little burdened.  It was super dirty, and really crowded.  The closer you got to the shore, it was even too crowded for cars to drive.  Two days here for me was plenty. I'm glad I saw it for the exposure, but when I go back to India I doubt I would make the time to return here.  Either way, Mahesh and I had a really fun time, and it was great getting to know him better.  He is extremely selfless, serving, and pure as gold in the heart.  I'm blessed to call him my brother.